Prompt: An adaptation of something that doesn’t actually exist.
Adaptation of the Book of the Alpha Couple (Alpha Couple are characters created by John Darnelle and are featured in several of his songs, but no story is actually written down)
“Our conversations are like minefields
No one’s found a safe way through one yet.”
- Southwood Plantation Road, by The Mountain Goats
HADDIE is up early, making breakfast before noon, has hell frozen over? She’s cleaning as she goes and humming a tune. ERNEST comes into the kitchen closer to what would be both of their “usual” state for the morning: beleaguered, bothered, and hungover. HADDIE hands him a mug of coffee as she easily flows through the room. He grunts what is probably appreciation and sits at the table while she finishes cooking.
ERNEST
Who put a quarter in you this morning?
HADDIE
I just woke up with an extra burst of energy today.
ERNEST
I guess as long as you don’t talk to me until I drink this coffee, I can appreciate the benefits of you being a chipper little morning dove.
HADDIE
Consider my lips sealed until you’ve had what’s in that mug and a refill.